Day 5, Night 4

We are 4 nights into the "new" routine of me not laying with John until he falls asleep. He is doing great, getting up just a few times, with a gentle reminder from me that if he stays in his bed that we will go to Target and he can pick out a special toy. Last night, he got up twice. Each time saying he is "hundry". He ain't hungry. But, it's a stall tactic and you have to admire the persistence. I took him back to his room after he got a box of raisins (by the way, I found this morning that he had 6 boxes of uneaten raisins in his room, hence the "he ain't hungry" hunch) and tucked him in. This was 9:30pm. I then went to sit on the couch with Chase and watch ER....I have not seen this show in so long and I just LOVE it. Although, I think that Abby and Luka are going to split. Back to my original topic - So, at 10pm the show was over and I thought - Great! He is asleep! So I walk back to his room and the little toot is laying in his bed, eyes wide open. I can see b/c he insists that his lamp be on, which I don't mind. I couldn't believe it! He must be planning on taking us to the cleaners with this "special toy" at Target! Good thing was that he stayed in his bed! We watched a little bit of the news and then I walked back to his room and he was fast asleep! 1 more night to go!
We have had our new fridge for a week now and I am still just as madly in love with it as I was on day 1! It is so nice and big! I have been thinking about it alot lately, though, and feel a twinge of guiltiness thinking that we have this big fridge just for 4 of us....I think of the families that don't have much and probably have an old fridge without an ice maker and probably have 5 or 6 kids. They probably would love to have my fridge, but can't do it financially. Then I realize that every thing Chase and I have, we are grateful for. I know that I can have nice things and not feel guilty(or try not to) because I am grateful and acknowledge that. Also, even if we didn't have those things, I would still be happy and grateful. Chase and I work very hard for ourselves and our family. Chase likes to say that we work so we can take nice family vacations. The vacations is what makes a permanent memory...that is what lasts forever. Also, I think about other people I know, people that take money as just a given. That it will always be there, that the nice things will always be there. They aren't grateful...(I think, anyway) that they feel they deserve it b/c they work so hard, or whatever. I don't feel I deserve anything. I feel like I am given things (right place, right time theory), both by my hard work and the kindness of God. I feel sorry for people that get caught up in the things without being grateful. I knew one person at one point in my life that had so much STUFF that this person never truly appreciated anything (I think, anyway). Everything was just there for the taking. and always would be. And I realized at one point, that I NEVER wanted to be like that. I am truly grateful that God put that person in my life so that I could learn that lesson. I know that was the whole point of that person being in my life at that time....now I realize that. Everything happens for a reason, and hopefully, you learn and grow from it. Even if tomorrow, we didn't have any things, I would still be happy that I have my family, my heart, and my life. I would be sad that I don't have my nice, big fridge....or my minivan, but I would still be grateful....